
34: Very Good – WOE.BEGONE
SUMMARY:
Put in the earpiece and do as you are told without speaking.
[This episode contains some violence. Listener discretion is advised. This episode also contains sudden loud noises. If you would like the timestamps for those noises, they are available in the description.]
Sudden noises:
17:35 – 17:50
24:02 – 24:08

TRANSCRIPT:
EPISODE 34: VERY GOOD
[Hey guys. You know about the patreon, patreon.com/woe_begone. Here are some of my favorite lesser-known perks: new episodes of The Diary of Aliza Schultz 6 weeks early, clips of my cat interrupting the show for $5 patrons, a monthly Q&A for $2 patrons, and the lost episode between episodes 30 and 31. Thanks to my 10 newest patrons for supporting the show: Allison Bourgeois, Melivis Grey Mystery, ElanorintheWoods, Brynne C, Samantha Topfer, C(l)ow(n)girl, jean, Tarabyte3, Mitch Gerads, and Ben Rowe. Enjoy.]
[This episode contains depictions of violence. Listener discretion is advised. This episode also contains sudden noises that might be distracting or frightening. If you would like the timestamp for when those sounds occur, they will be at the bottom of the description of this episode.]
[Intro theme plays.]
[Transformed voice]:
Alright, Hunter. You can hear me through the earpiece? Tap twice on the table in front of you if you can hear me speaking to you.
[Hunter taps twice on the table.]
Very good. I assume that you have looked through that file I left for you in your cabin and you believe me well enough to cooperate and put the earpiece in your ear as the file instructed you to. That’s good. I am going to need your cooperation. There will be consequences if you do not cooperate. Nothing personal, but we only have a short window to get this done and you are our best candidate. Do exactly what I ask without interfering or speaking and everything in that file will remain hypothetical. I trust that you would prefer that to be the case. I will do my best throughout this task to convince you that I intend to make good on that promise. Do you understand what I am telling you?
[Silence]
Correct, no speaking. That was a test. Tap twice on the table in front of you if you understand what I have just told you.
[Hunter taps twice on the table.]
Very good. If you are successful in your mission today, you will return to your cabin to find this file is gone. It will have never existed. Your cooperation will be rewarded. Please understand this as you go about your tasks today. [Pause.]
The first tasks are not difficult ones. I require you to gather some items for me inside of Tier 1, something you have more than enough authorization to accomplish unperturbed. The first thing that I want you to do is to leave your cabin and head to the nearest red flag cabin. Grab a bag on the way out and place the sturdiest knife that you have into the bag. In addition to a knife, there will be other important objects that you will need to carry with you along the way. You may now stand up and leave your cabin.
[The sound of a door opening and closing.]
Very good. While we are walking to the red flag cabin, I will explain to you your purpose inside of the cabin. Inside one of the drawers will be a set of files. I need you to take out your phone and take pictures of every single page inside of that drawer. There might be hundreds of pages or only just a few. The rest of your tasks will not be possible unless you photograph every single page. You will not understand what is on these pages but I will understand. Snap your fingers twice if you understand your instructions.
[Hunter snaps his fingers twice.]
Very good. That is not the only thing that you are going to retrieve inside of this red flag cabin. In another drawer, there will be a device. You may need to check every drawer in order to find it, but I am certain that it is in the red flag cabin. It is a rectangular device with a handle. I doubt that you have seen one before, but it should be the only thing in the drawers inside the red cabin that is not a file of some type. It is important that nobody see that you have this device. Throughout this mission I will remind you of the importance of remaining unnoticed. We are undertaking a mission that is not approved by the staff of security of O.V.E.R. and it is important to limit their interference as much as possible. The device in the red flag cabin is an item that you would not be expected to have with you. As such, you should put it in your bag before you leave the cabin. Snap your fingers twice if you understand your instructions.
[Hunter snaps his fingers twice.]
Very good. We should be at the red flag cabin now. Please enter and follow the instructions that I have given you without deviating from them. This should be quite simple.
[There is the sound of a door opening and closing, then the sound of rustling and drawers opening and closing. The sound of Hunter operating his phone camera can be heard faintly.]
It sounds like you are taking photos of the files. When you have taken photos of all of the files, send them to [garbled]. You should wait until I have confirmed that I have received the files before exiting the red flag cabin. In the meantime, please search for the device that I described to you.
[There is the sound of putting papers away, and then the sound of more drawers opening.] [Pause.]
Have you located the device? Tap twice on the desk if you have located the device I described to you.
[Hunter taps on the desk twice.]
Very good. I have received the files that you have sent me. Thank you for your cooperation. Please store the device inside of the bag for safekeeping. Do not allow anybody to check the bag for any reason. If anyone asks to search your bag, disengage from them immediately and regroup back at your cabin where we will start the process over again. This is tantamount to our success. Failure will result in the actualization of the contents of the file in your cabin. Tap twice on the desk once you have put the device in the bag if you understand.
[There is a zipping and unzipping sound. Hunter taps twice on the desk, more begrudgingly than before.]
Very good. You may now exit the cabin and begin walking toward building 116E. [Door opens and closes.]
Due to the nature of our mission and our need to avoid having your bag checked, we must enter Tier 2 through 116E. This building was chosen because it presents a prime opportunity to get through without looking out of place. We will also be retrieving a second device from the warehouse portion of the building. Security should be especially lax there at this moment. Normally, you would get a code from the front desk or from the person who is escorting you into Tier 2, but that will not be necessary. Do not speak to the woman at the front desk of 116E. Do not engage with her. Do not give her any reason to suspect that something is going on. Smile politely to her and enter the door code that I give you. Snap your fingers twice if you understand what to do inside of building 116E.
[Hunter snaps his fingers twice.]
Very good. You should be near 116E now. The code is 5164489 this week. That’s 5164489. 5164489. Memorize this code. 5164489. 5164489. Before you enter the building you will need to put the earpiece in your pocket. If the woman at the desk remembers that you had an earpiece in when you walked through the building, it might stand out to her as something that is out-of-place. You must not place the earpiece back into your ear until you are in the warehouse portion of the building, after you have made sure that no one is watching you. The code, again, is 5164489. 5164489. Snap your fingers twice if you understand the instructions and then put the earpiece in your pocket. You will need to snap your fingers twice more once you are in the warehouse to indicate that you have successfully made it into the warehouse.
[Hunter snaps his fingers twice.]
[There are some shuffling noises, then the sound of 7 numbers being pressed on a keypad, a door opening and closing, and some more shuffling noises.]
[There is some silence and then the sound of Hunter snapping his fingers twice.]
Very good. I assume that you have returned the earpiece to your ear and have checked to ensure that nobody is watching you inside of the warehouse. Please retrieve your knife from the bag. Look at the labels on the storage racks in front of you. You should see a storage space labeled 65N. I need you to use the knife in order to open one of the boxes stored in 65N and take a device out of the box to put in your bag. I understand that you will have to climb on top of the lower pallet of boxes in order to do this but I think that you are quite capable of this task. Please remain as quiet as possible during this retrieval for your own safety. Snap your fingers twice once you have retrieved the device and stored with and the knife inside of your bag.
[The sound of climbing, the sound of cutting open a box, the sound of coming down, zipping and unzipping. Hunter snaps his fingers two times.]
Very good. If you are still certain that no one is watching you, please find the warehouse exit and exit into Tier 2, shutting the door fully behind you. Once outside, begin walking toward the boulders that lie on the border of Tiers 1 and 2 in your vicinity. They are the ones that you would know from having seen them on the other side of a fence from your time in Tier 1. Those boulders are our next destination. It will be a short walk from where you are now.
[Door opens and closes.]
There should not be anyone else at the boulders when you get there, but if there are, I want you to walk by and not engage. It is only once you are sure that you are alone that you are to proceed to the boulders. If there is someone at the boulders when you get there, I want you to get to a safe distance and snap your fingers three times. Snap your fingers twice if you understand your instructions.
[Hunter snaps his fingers two times.]
[There is some silence, then slightly labored breathing as Hunter picks up his pace. A few seconds later, Hunter snaps his fingers three times.]
Noted. Please wait a moment before proceeding. I am attempting to fix the issue on my end but there is always the chance that it will resolve on its own. In the meantime, I can instruct you about what you will be doing once you are able to access the boulders. Upon inspecting the boulders, you should see a port the same size and shape of the device that I had you take from the red flag cabin. Showing the abundance of caution you have already proven yourself capable of in order to avoid being noticed, you will retrieve the device from your bag and insert it into the port. You might feel a mild to moderate electric shock upon doing so. This is normal and expected and should not incapacitate you. The technology we are using today is highly volatile and not fully understood. Please try not to cry out in pain in the event that you are shocked.
You may now walk toward the boulders again. Repeat the same protocol as before if there is still a person there. If not, follow the instructions that I have given you. Snap your fingers twice once the device has been inserted into the port. Leave the device in the port when you have inserted it. I will await your confirmation.
[There are the sounds of some breathing, minor footfall, then some rustling as Hunter checks the boulders. Pause. The sound of two metal devices meeting. Then a grunt as Hunter bears a minor shock. Slightly heavy breathing. Hunter snaps his fingers two times.]
Very good. Our mission inside of Tier 2 is done and it is now time to proceed into Tier 3. I know that you do not regularly have access to the inside of Tier 3 but that is not a serious impediment to our mission. Leaving the device inside of the port, please proceed across the path to the abandoned security building that recently suffered severe damages. It should be obvious from the outside which building I am referring to if you are not familiar with it already. The security system on the outside doors is disabled, so you should be able to get in with a strong arm. You are easily strong enough to push your way in.
As you walk there, I will give you instructions as to what to do once you are inside of the building. The building is in shambles after a series of malicious actions taken inside of it, but it is important that we find a computer with the O.V.E.R. security software on it. It is important to find such a computer available to us right now, because this is the prime window for us to accomplish the rest of our task. Since it is currently normal business hours, computers in fully functional offices will be in use and heavily observed. The reason why this mission must be performed right now is none of your concern. You are not here to scrutinize my motivations. You are hear to do the job that I have asked you to do exactly as I have asked you to do it in order to avoid severe repercussions. I am confident that I have your full understanding and cooperation in this manner. You should be across the path and at the door to the building at this point. I await your further cooperation.
[Silence, then the sound of Hunter busting open a door.]
Very good. I need you to inspect the computers inside of the office. Many of them will be broken beyond repair, but some of them will be fully or partially functional. Find one that looks as though it might boot up and plug it in. Once it has booted up, if you can get in without a password, please proceed to the O.V.E.R. security software, likely on the desktop. This should be software that you are relatively familiar with at this point.
[There is some sifting through electronics noises. Hunter eventually finds a decent computer and turns it on. There are clicking noises from a mouse.]
Once you have the security software open, I need you to find the building that you are in and your exact location within the building. I’m sure that you are able to ascertain what the purpose of this step is. The next thing that you are going to do is to find a second location inside of Tier 3. You will see a building inside of Tier 3 labeled 357A. You will pick a location behind 357A, where nobody will see you materialize. We began this mission when you put the earpiece in your ear at 10:47am and 38 seconds. After you select the location behind 357A, you will set the arrival time to 10:47am and 38 seconds. Tap the spacebar on the keyboard you are using to input this information twice once you have entered all of this information into the software.
[Hunter taps the spacebar twice.]
Very good. Since you have traveled before, you know how to brace yourself and what to expect. Once you hit enter, the software will prompt you for a password, since normally one needs authorization in order to transport something into the time or space of Tier 3. For our mission, this is trivial, thanks to you. The files you photographed in the red flag cabin contain many types of information. The relevant bit that it contains in this situation is the information that allows me to generate a code to transport you into Tier 3. Do not worry about the ramifications of entering Tier 3 without authorization. Just as I have promised to make good on my word to eradicate the file I gave you from existence, I also promise that your travel into and out of Tier 3 will be done without repercussions from O.V.E.R. Though you are not a consensual volunteer to this mission, I do intent to hold up my end of the bargain. This is not mere altruism. Upholding my promises ensures that you will not think that it is safer or more preferable to abandon the mission or to call out to someone at O.V.E.R. for help. It is my intention to make those options as unappealing as possible.
Now that you are primed for your entrance into Tier 3, you may hit enter and start the process whenever you are ready. Please put the earpiece into the bag before continuing to ensure that it will remain with you throughout the transport process. I understand that the transport might be disorienting, but I will need you to get your bearings as fast as possible once inside of Tier 3. Immediately upon arrival, return the earpiece to your ear and snap your fingers twice to indicate that you are ready for the next step of the process.
[Zip, unzip. Pause. Deep breath. Hunter his the enter key.]
[Time travel sound.]
[Hunter gasping for air, trying to compose himself, zip, dig in bag, zip.]
[Hunter snaps his fingers twice.]
Very good. I appreciate your thorough cooperation thus far. It has made the process less painful for both of us. Please take a moment to catch your breath and to get your bearings, assuming that nobody can see you behind building 357A. [Labored breathing.] While you are recovering from the transport, I will tell you about your next and final task. As you already know, there is a second device in your bag that you got from the warehouse in 116E. You are to deliver that device to a room on the top floor of 357A, the third floor. There will be a conference room labeled 308. You are to enter the building, speaking to nobody. You will take the stairs to the third floor of the building. You will enter conference room 308 and deliver the device. There will not be anyone to deliver the device to. You are simply delivering the item to the room. You are to place the device on the table in the center of the room. Once you have done so, you will tap the table twice in order to indicate to me that you have completed your task.
Once you have delivered this device to this conference room, a series of events will occur that you do not need to understand in order to fulfill your task. What you do need to know, though, is that these events will happen fast and not necessarily in a way that you will be able to understand as someone who experiencing time in order from the point in time that you currently reside. From your vantage point, you will need to run as fast as you can and as far as you can. This is to ensure that you are alive at the end of the mission. However far you think you should run, I ensure you that you must run farther than that in order to live through what is about to happen. I ask that you not feel tempted to abandon the mission now. If you cooperate, I will make do on what I have promised you and you will make it through this process alive. If you abandon the mission, you will be stuck in Tier 3 without authorization, having used software without authorization, having stolen a top-secret device without authorization. I am presenting a more pleasant alternative. Please snap your fingers twice if you understand this last part of your task and are ready to begin working on it.
[Silence.]
Hunter…?
[Hunter begrudgingly snaps his fingers two times.]
Very good. Please make your way to the front entrance of the building. All of the doors from this point forward will be unlocked. All you have to do is make it up two flights of stairs to the third floor of the building. As with 116E, do not engage with anyone you see. Move quickly but try not to draw any attention. You should be moving fast enough that attention will not matter, but it is important to be careful. Once you tap twice on the desk to indicate that you have delivered the device, it will not matter whether you are drawing attention whatsoever. An irreversible process will have already been put into motion. I am reiterating my advice to run as fast as you can and to not stop running. You do not need to concern yourself with how you will get back out of Tier 3 without detection. I have already made arrangements for that to happen for you once you complete your task. All evidence of your participation will be completely eliminated.
At this point, you should have enough information to complete your final task. This will be my final correspondence to you. Thank you for your cooperation. Other participants have not been as willing to go along with instructions and have made coordinating this task less civil than it had to be. You can expect your reward for your completion of the task to be immediate. You do not yet understand what state things will be in after you complete your task, but once it is done you will know what to look for.
I apologize for eliminating your agency in the way that I have done today. It was necessary to accomplish a crucially important mission. This would not have been possible without you. Whenever you are ready, please enter building 357A and place the device on the third floor in room number 308.
[Footsteps, footsteps, door. Sound of placing a metal object on a table. Hunter snaps his fingers two times and takes off. Running, running down a stairwell, bursting out of a door.]
[The sound of an explosion.]
[End theme plays.]