89: Am I Going To Die? – WOE.BEGONE
SUMMARY
What did you do to me?
[WARNING: This episode contains depictions of medical distress and experimentation. Listener discretion is advised. It also contains some loud noises, the timestamps for which will be in the description.]
LOUD NOISE WARNING: 19:20 – 19:50
CREDITS:
David Ault as Ty Betteridge
TRANSCRIPT
WOE.BEGONE EPISODE 89: AM I GOING TO DIE?
INTRO THEME PLAYS
We hear intensely labored breathing and groaning from Mike. The room is otherwise quiet. We hear a door open and close.
TY
Mike? I wasn’t expecting you. When they told me that you stumbled up to the front gate, I thought there must have been a misunderstanding. What brings you back?
MIKE
[Groaning.] I need help.
TY
I can see that. Is this residual pain from the last time you were here, perchance?
MIKE
Yes.
TY
Oh, poor thing. You waited this long in your state? You look positively miserable.
MIKE
Can you help me?
TY
I can try. We’ve been working on therapies for this exact sort of thing. You… interrupted those experiments, you know?
MIKE
I surrender, Ty. I’m not here to explain myself. I need help.
TY
No explanation necessary. You wanted the cowboy and so did his new pal on the motorcycle. And you got him back. I’m trying to be level-headed with regards to the stunt that you pulled. We aren’t correcting it and getting angry is not constructive. Did you know in some countries it isn’t expressly illegal to attempt to escape from prison because wanting to be free is considered a core part of human nature? I try to think about it that way. I can be quite cross with you, but still understand why you did it. We got some useful data ourselves out of the whole mess. Can you take a deep breath for me?
We hear Mike take a shallow breath.
MIKE
No.
TY
Oh dear. You should have come to me much sooner. We could have had you all patched up by now. What was the plan, Mike? To die in that dingy little apartment in Riga? Regardless, I’m glad you swallowed your pride. How did Michael take the news that you were coming here?
MIKE
I didn’t tell him. He told me to come to you. Right after it happened. But I don’t want him to know. He’d just try to sheepdog me. This is my business, not his.
TY
Tsk tsk. I fear that will make things worse once he finally does find out.
MIKE
He doesn’t need to know everything. He goes places all the time and never tells me. And he especially doesn’t need me telling him that he was right.
TY
No kidding. You’re becoming like him, you know? He snuck off to seek our help with Mustardseed and now you’re here for help with your injuries. I can’t help but see the resemblance.
MIKE
Please, don’t.
TY
I think it would help you greatly to understand that you are the same person as him. And Mikey, for that matter. I think it would bring some solutions into focus for you.
MIKE
I don’t think so.
TY
I know that you don’t think so. And your reasoning is how you ended up showing up here with a shotgun and breaking yourself out of captivity.
MIKE
Which one were you?
TY
Pardon?
MIKE
The Tys in the break-in. There were two of them.
TY
Oh, none of them. I have been separated from all time duplicates for some time, actually. It’s a security issue, you see. So that when one of them gets… blasted apart with a shotgun, for instance… we don’t lose everything that we’ve been working on. Alright, Mike. I am going to dim the lights. I want you to focus on the back wall of the room.
We hear a lightswitch.
MIKE
How many of you are there?
TY
Why would I know that? We are only able to contact each other in case of an emergency.
MIKE
You don’t know how many of you there are?
TY
Could you focus on the wall, please? Pick a spot and stare directly at it.
MIKE
Fine. [pause] I’m sorry that I killed you.
TY
Focus on the wall, please. You didn’t kill me, Mike. I’m still right here.
MIKE
I killed the other Ty.
TY
Oh, that’s not… really… how this works. And the whole reason you’re in the state that you’re in is because I shot back. It really doesn’t matter, though. Seriously.
MIKE
[Groans] That light is bright.
TY
It’s to test your pupils. But the intrusion is water under the bridge at this point. I would say “no hard feelings,” but I’m not quite sure that the sentiment is reciprocated.
MIKE
Why don’t you care?
TY
Hmm? Because your theatrics barely caused a scratch? You got your Michael back and killed one of the Ty duplicates, so what? Oh, and broke one of the two-way mirrors. I could send that August cowboy a bill for damages if that would make you feel even.
MIKE
Leave August out of it.
TY
Joking, Mike. I know that you don’t like my jokes, but you could at least pick up on them once in awhile. I’ll be blunt with you: your vitals are baaaaad. If you went to a normal hospital they might transfer you to hospice. You can’t breathe, your blood pressure is scarily low, your pupils aren’t responding properly to light. I’m sure if I ran bloodwork I’d see all sorts of other ailments. You’re dying of a gunshot wound with some bonus complications piled on top for good measure.
MIKE
Am I going to die?
TY
It is poor form to promise anything, but we are uniquely equipped to help you, Mike. The only capable place on Earth, at least as far as I know.
MIKE [weaker]
Am I going to die?
TY
I know that it’s natural to want to be reassured, but if I make– [trailing off: false promises to you, that’s much worse etc etc]
MIKE [weaker]
Am I going to die?
TY
Mike? Uh, Mike? Hello? [snaps fingers] Are you still here?
MIKE [whisper]
Am I going to die?
TY [over intercom?]
Oh dear. Hey, Felix? We have a visiting Mike Walters who is in critical condition. Can you meet me in the evals room ASAP? We need to get him somewhere that we can stabilize him immediately. Drop whatever it is you’re doing. There’s no time to waste. Thanks, Fe. [pauses and sighs] Pfff… Mike Walters… What a mess.
SCENE TRANSITION.
We hear Mike groggily waking up.
TY [relieved]
Finally. Mike, can you hear me?
MIKE
Mmm-hmm.
TY
Do you know where you are?
MIKE
I’m at Ty Betteridge’s house.
TY
Not exactly. I’ll give half credit for that answer. Do you know who you are?
MIKE
I wasn’t sure of that even before you shot me.
TY
That’s the Mike we all know and love. Other than groggy, how else would you describe how you feel?
MIKE
Groggy is the main thing. How long was I asleep for?
TY
18 hours, give or take? You showed up yesterday afternoon. I didn’t know that you’d be out this long. Apologies for the makeshift sleeping arrangements. We didn’t have a room prepared.
MIKE
Do I have to stay here?
TY
[Laughs.] No, of course not. We have enough Mikes as it is, I assure you. That’s the reason for the lack of vacancy. We can even place you back in the time period you arrived here from if you want to keep up appearances. You shouldn’t continue to hide from Michael, though. I’m not sure that I fully understand why you’re hiding it from him at all, honestly.
MIKE
Michael won’t know I’m gone. He’s with August. And Mikey’s with Edgar at O.V.E.R. for the weekend.
TY
Oh, is this about the new cowboy in town? That’s why you’re not telling him.
MIKE
I’m not talking to you about August.
TY
Very well. But: you were staying alone in the apartment? You shouldn’t have even been going to the restroom without someone checking on you, let alone a whole weekend. But, if that gave you the opportunity to sneak out and get help, then maybe it was for the best.
MIKE
What did you do to me?
TY
We treated your gunshot wound. Does it feel better? You definitely sound better.
MIKE
Yeah. I feel better than I have in a long time. Since before the injury.
TY
You should be very careful. You’re doing better but you’re not at 100%. Don’t overexert.
MIKE
What did you do to me, Ty? How were you able to patch me up like this? You– did you…?
TY
Is that an avenue of questioning that you actually want to venture down? How the sausage gets made and all that? You must know the answer. It must be why you came to me in the first place. Surely, Michael told you about the research I was doing with him.
MIKE
He told me about the pinky finger. And Alaska Mikey told me about the Edgar experiments. How you consolidated him with…
TY
With a deceased time duplicate of himself?
MIKE
You tortured him.
TY
I can assure you that it was made such that that never happened, Mike. Nobody got tortured. I don’t know who “Alaska Mikey” is, but you seem to have the gist of it. We used another “iteration” as you call them to boost your strength. Not even an “iteration” in my opinion.
MIKE
You consolidated me? But I don’t feel any different. I don’t feel another Mike.
TY
That’s because we have so much access to recent iterations of you, Mike. You were in the compound. We have your coordinates from the moment before you consolidated with the dying Mike. We can iterate that Mike Walters as much as we want, any time that we want. Which is one reason that I’m not pestering you to stick around. We have as much of you as we could ask for. I simply consolidated you with a very recent past iteration. Think of it like reverting to a backup.
MIKE
But… it didn’t help Edgar. When you killed him. It failed.
TY
The Mikey that you’re talking about must have only been around for the preliminary experiments in that area of study. That is the point of experimentation, after all. The first time is a total disaster, then you step back, find one variable to change, test that, and then it’s still probably a gigantic failure but you can move on to the next variable. Repeat hundreds of times, thousands. We have the time and the resources to do that. So, by the time you showed up with your cowboy hat and shotgun, we had already made loads of progress. We were even able to salvage that iteration of Ty Betteridge.
MIKE
The Ty that I killed?
TY
The very same. And we salvaged him in the same way that we are patching you back up. Well, except that it was a lot more work. But we had some procedures in place already and they were fairly rigorous, so we are making steady progress on bringing him back up to full health. It’s a bit more of a battle than I expect you to have. You were in much better shape when you showed up, even with you waiting far too long to come see me.
MIKE
…That Ty was dead when we left the compound. Dead, dead. And that’s still an understatement. The shotgun was total overkill. There was nothing left of him. How could you have possibly saved him without traveling back to stop us? Which I know you didn’t. I still remember it all. Michael is still free.
TY
If you’re wondering if we’re revolutionizing the concept of medicine as the world knows it, then the answer is: yes, we are. That must be the point of your confusion. We are in the midst of preventing many types of death with extremely minor consequences. And, for your participation, you are entitled to the fruits of that labor. Why go back and disrupt your badass hero moment when it is easier to make everyone happy instead?
MIKE
Can you save Edgar?
TY
Edgar? Your Edgar or Mustardseed or… who exactly?
MIKE
Edgar. Michael’s Edgar is dead. According to Mustardseed, he dies about 8 years from now. My Edgar has 3 years left.
TY
Oh. I’m sure that’s in a Michael file somewhere. My apologies. Each participant is capable of generating thousands of pages of information, a truly unknowable amount for a single person to understand. How does Edgar die?
MIKE
I don’t know. I don’t think anyone knows but Edgar and Michael. And both of them make it sound inevitable.
TY
Hmm. And this happens in 8 years? I have bad news for you, Mike. A lot happens in 8 years. All of this progresses, expands, falls into the hands of more people than this compound, perhaps even to your Base. If both of them are acting like there’s nothing anyone can do, then they probably have an excellent reason to think that. My advice: remember that everything is temporary. We have not invented immortality and we aren’t going to. And, in the meantime, we will get you all patched up so that you can have the three best years of your life with Edgar. How does that sound?
MIKE
Like a hard truth to swallow.
TY
It’s been a rough few weeks for you, Mike. Would you like to stay here tonight? We can treat you again first thing in the morning and then send you home.
MIKE
I can only assume that if you wanted to keep me here against my will that you would simply tell me to my face. This isn’t a trick?
TY
No trick. Stay?
MIKE
[Sigh.] I guess so. I’m still tired. If you weren’t here I could roll over and fall back asleep no problem.
TY
Then I’ll leave you to roll over and fall back asleep. [Snap, mouth click, wink] Goodnight, Mike.
MIKE
Goodnight, Ty.
SCENE TRANSITION
MIKE
Michael? Michael, is that you?
MICHAEL
Mike? Which Mike are you? How are you out wandering the halls?
MIKE
I’m not here against my will. I got consolidated with a dying Mike and started dying, myself. I’m staying here while they treat me and I wasn’t in a room when I fell asleep, so the door wasn’t locked. I was looking for whatever I could find in the hallway. You’re not… my Michael, right? They didn’t capture you a second time, did they?
MICHAEL
No… I’m not your Michael. I don’t know how many there are. But I know that one of them made it out. Lucky bastard. You’re not here to free me, are you?
MIKE
I don’t have a key to get into your room.
MICHAEL
That’s just as well. I’m an Overnighter. You’d be better off puttin’ me down than lettin’ me out right now. They tore me up, this morning. Or it’s been this morning a few times. Look, see my eye?
MIKE
Eugh. Can you see out of that at all?
MICHAEL
No. They did worse than that, but I ain’t gonna show ya. In the morning they’ll start amalgamating us. The longer we’re apart the more difficult it is, so they’re using us to solve the most difficult cases possible. Different ones with different wounds, seeing what changes, what doesn’t. Then they snap us back. But sometimes you get snapped back into being an Overnighter and start the process again without a break. You get 3 on, 4 off.
MIKE
Jesus. So you’ve been like that for up to 3 days at this point? Or 3 weeks? Years?
MICHAEL
3 weeks, Mike. 3 weeks Overnight, 4 weeks off. The 4 weeks are worse. Knowing what’s at the end of them.
MIKE
I have to get you out of here. I have to get you out of here. I can’t tonight but… We can plan another break-in.
MICHAEL
If you’re breaking Michaels out one at a time, you’re going to be spending the rest of your life plannin’ break-ins.
MIKE
Then I’ll talk to Ty. He’s been friendly so far. I’ll tell him that he has to come up with another way to do this.
MICHAEL
You’ll see how friendly Ty is if you start pushin’ back against him. Don’t jeopardize your recovery, Mike. You got a Michael, a Mikey, an Edgar, a Base. Get healthy and then get out of here.
MIKE
I can’t leave you here knowing this is what’s happening!
MICHAEL
Keep your fuckin’ voice down, Mike. You might not be here against your will but they will not tolerate you wandering the halls at night. Go back to bed. Take care of yourself. And get out of here. Get out of here. Get out of here, Mike. Do you understand? Get out of here while you can still see clearly enough to walk out the door. Get out of here.
MIKE
You’re scaring me.
MICHAEL
Good. Run. Get out of here. Get out of here. They will obliterate you. They will tear you limb from limb and then tell you that they didn’t do that. Get what you need and go. Get out of here. Get out of here.
We hear banging from the inside of the room, that gets louder across the scene.
MICHAEL
GET OUT OF HERE. GET OUT OF HERE. GET OUT OF HERE.
MIKE
You said someone would come if I was too loud?
MICHAEL
THEN GO BEFORE THEY GET HERE. GET OUT OF HERE. GET OUT OF HERE. GET OUT OF HERE.
We hear rapid footsteps leading away from the door, then footsteps approaching the door, a key in a lock, the door opening. We hear this from MIKE’s perspective, around the corner, breathing heavily.
TY
Michael! I understand that overnight shifts in the program can be taxing, but you need to compose yourself. I would hate to need to administer a sedative. That could interfere with the experiment and prolong the amount of time you have to remain in this condition. I know you don’t want that. I don’t want that. Can you keep it down for the rest of the night? If I have to come warn you again, there will have to be consequences. I’m sorry. Do we have an agreement?
MICHAEL [Mumbling]
Yeah. Yeah.
SCENE TRANSITION.
TY
Mike Walters! How are you feeling this morning?
MIKE
I’m feeling… fine.
TY
Bags under your eyes still! I was hoping that you would get enough rest. Rest is vital to recovery.
MIKE
I slept as much as I could. It wasn’t easy.
TY
Very well. I’m sure you’re still experiencing severe discomfort. Maybe after today’s procedure you can rest easier. And back in your own bed in Riga.
MIKE
I don’t think that I can do it. The procedure.
TY
…You’re not out of the woods yet, you know.
MIKE
I don’t think I can let you parade a healthy Mike in front of me, have him stand beside me, and then consolidate into me so that I can be a little healthier and he becomes much worse for wear.
TY
Oh, no. It isn’t like that. You don’t have to be in the same room at all. In fact, that’s messy and we don’t do that unless we have to. We know exactly when and where to supply the therapeutic time duplicate from. He will exist separately from you from the point in time he’s in, but only for a split second– less than a split second, really– and then become a part of you in the present. There isn’t another Mike, not really, even by your standards. You’re quite lucky in this regard. If you were a soldier wounded in combat, we wouldn’t have this plethora of options. But you’re not. You’re Mike Walters.
MIKE
I… [sigh] Alright. If it will make me better again, I’ll do it. How many more times before I can stop?
TY
A few, most likely.
MIKE
And then I don’t have to come back here?
TY
Not if you don’t want to, though follow-up exams could elucidate a lot about your condition.
MIKE
I’m… When I’m done with this, I think I’m going… Well, it’s none of your business.
TY
Well, then I won’t pry. Shall we get on with it then? So you can get back to your business?
MIKE
[Sighs.] Yeah, I’m ready.
TY
Great. Then, stand right there where that red X is on the ground and steady yourself by holding onto the metal bars to your left and right, taking careful note to place your palms on the blue dots. Red X, blue dots. Do you understand?
MIKE
Yes. I’m ready.
TY
Wonderful. This will only take a moment and will scarcely feel like anything. Okay, Mike. Stand as perfectly still as you can. Hold your breath when I begin the countdown. And we’re good to go. Beginning in… 3… 2… 1…
We hear a short time travel sound.
END THEME PLAYS.
WOE.BEGONE 